Pennsylvania Coup!

Blood in the streets of University of Pennsylvania…

by Tom Adkins
03/16/04

When Hillary Clinton sniffed about a “vast right wing conspiracy,” conservatives across America giggled, guffawed, and fell on the floor laughing. On the political battlefields, it’s pretty clear that the right wing can hardly conspire to organize a decent barbecue, let alone successfully bring down a crooked President. That’s why we conservatives are surprised when a talented young leader rises up. Or rears his ugly head, as the case may be.

A right wing wunderkind is resurrecting the long lost art of bareknuckles leadership. Meet Dave Copley, current head of the Pennsylvania State College Republicans. Some of his recent maneuvers have left heads shaking. And rolling. This University of Pennsylvania junior has become a professor in cutthroat politics. And he’s right here in Philadelphia, where you can still find a healthy trade in tawdry political shenanigans. But nobody in this town has anything on this kid. So to speak.

Here’s the story. The Pennsylvania College Republicans are normally a congenial group of kids. You know, meetings, bake sales, a few debates, indignant letters to the school newspaper, that sort of stuff. Not exactly earth-shaking, but nice to see. After all, conservatism typically doesn’t become apparent until after matriculation, when the average college students spend about a decade unraveling the typical nonsense taught at today’s universities.

But ambition starts early for some folks.

The action started when fellow Pennster and local U of Pennsylvania College Republican chair Dan Gomez decided to run for Copley’s state chair. Obviously miffed, Copley decided to engineer a Gomez ouster at the group’s next meeting. First, Copley emailed a large circle of fellow collegian “friends,” asking them to stop by and “participate” in a kangaroo court and help his admittedly fraudulent ballot box stuffing. Amazingly, the email exists to prove it:

Hey guys,

I need a big favor. I need ya’ll to show up for the College Republican meeting at 8:30 PM on Tuesday night in the Golkin Room of Houston Hall.

Let’s just say that one of our officers needs to be urgently removed from office and we’re gonna need a little help bit of help at the ballot-box to make sure this gets accomplished. And since this particular officer doesn’t know he’s going to be removed yet, I’d appreciate if ya’ll could keep this on the d/l.

Should take no more than 10 - 15 mins.
Dave

Brazen! Galling! Shameless! Bold-faced! Audacious! I’m running out of adjectives! Then, with Nixon-like paranoia, Copley circulated an email to the real College Republicans, loaded with all sorts of dubious accusations, accusing Gomez of doing nothing, working against the party, nepotism (for Gomez's girlfriend – elected to her post, incidentally), poor fundraising, failing to represent the club, blah, blah, blah. No doubt these issues were on the minds of the groups 30 members as they traveled to their meeting, ready to debate the Gomez issue. But as they arrived, they were met by about 50 freshly minted “visitors,” who stuck around long enough to cast their ballots. The final tally? Gomez lost 57-20.

Geez, whatever happened to tearing down posters and locker room wedgies?

So there you have it. Cheating. Secrets. Plots. Ballot box stuffing. And a shocked little campus group still trying to clear the carnage. All that’s missing are dead bodies, yellow police tape and the forensic team. Maybe that’s next week.

But let’s be fair to Mr. Copley. Few politicians rise to their posts without questionable goings-on. With today’s intense media spotlight, it’s hard to find the old political chutzpah of William “Boss” Tweed or Joe Kennedy, though Florida’s Supreme Court came close in 2000. But right here in Philadelphia, this California kid has taken the lessons of the old masters, tossed in a dash of local Philly flavor and for the moment, and risen above the dead bones of a rival. Copley faced the high road or the low road…and chose subterranean. Thanks, Mr. Copley. Just when universities across America were beginning to believe in the love and kindness exuded by the Republican party…okay, maybe not. But could there be a more blatant self-portrait of the uncaring heartless conservative reputation? It’s not hard to imagine the average college kid picking up the Penn’s campus newspaper Daily Pennsylvanian and cracking a wry smile, asking themselves, ”Compassionate conservatives, eh?”

Dave Copley is certainly headed for notoriety. It’s just hard to figure out if he’s destined for the White House or the Big House.