by Thomas Lindaman
03/16/05
West Virginia Senator Robert Byrd compared Republicans to Nazis. New DNC Chairman Howard Dean suggested Republicans are evil. With the exception of the noticeable absence of Right Said Fred and the DiVinyls, I was beginning to think I'd stepped into a time warp and landed back in the 1990s.
What is up with the sheer venom coming from the Democrats these days? Granted, Republicans aren't exactly angels in the realm of attacking Democrats in a less-than-civilized manner, but this stuff has gotten downright personal. I haven't seen this much hatred for anything since the reviews for "Catwoman." And on a side note, shouldn't you be forced to give up a Best Actress Oscar if you go from a good film to a complete piece of flaming dog crap put on celluloid?
There are some easy answers as to why Democrats are going nuclear with the negativity. Democrats have been heading towards obscurity at Warp 9 since Bill Clinton's impeachment, and no one seems to be willing to say, "Cap'n, we kinna give 'er any more power or she'll blow!" But enough about Hillary.
The real issue at hand is that Democrats are doing what Republicans did in the 90s against Clinton. There were times I was embarrassed to be a Republican, not just from the advancement of conspiracy theories shakier than a McDonalds on the San Andreas Fault, but from the utter lack of strategy. A bad Stratego player could have figured out how to beat Republicans in the 90s. Unfortunately for Democrats, they chose a bad Stratego player, Terry McAuliffe, to head up the DNC. And it's cost them big time.
Not that this doesn't give me an evil warm feeling inside, mind you. Watching Democrats constantly get smacked around by George W. Bush puts me in full schadenfreude mode. (For the uninitiated, schadenfreude is a German term loosely translated to mean taking joy at someone else's misfortune. In other words, enjoying the Jerry Springer Show.) But even this get old and ugly, especially in the advent of the recent comments by Byrd, Dean, and other Democrats. It's getting to the point that you're more likely to see civility on pro wrestling than on C-Span.
Naturally, our inclination is to try to fix the problem. Republicans have been nice to Democrats to the point of practically baking them cookies whenever Democrats accused them of wanting to kill the elderly. Some conservatives and Republicans have said the best way to handle this situation is to fight fire with fire, and there is some merit to that line of work. If you've ever played "the Dozens," you know the best way to shut down someone is to taunt them to the point that they can't respond. However, this will only add to the problem because then it will give Democrats more fuel from which to draw on and get even more vile in the future. Then again, there's not a lot of room to work with once you call someone a Nazi. I mean, what's worse? Right now, the only two things worse than Nazis are the IRS and Tom Green.
Ignoring the taunts doesn't work, either. Republicans did that in the 90s and it cost them dearly because the Democrats were the ones who controlled public perception. And in politics, perception is everything. Think about it. Would Al Gore be President today if he had a better handle on what the public wanted? Okay, probably not, but you get the idea.
But there's one method that I've developed that confronts the negativity while not completely giving into it. It's called turning the tables. And, no, it has nothing to do with rap music. Check dat my peeps?
Here's an example. I've been called a "right wing Nazi" so many times Prince William has been sending me fan letters. It used to get me upset, but then I realized that the reason my detractors throw out the Nazi card is because they can't refute what I've said with rhetoric that rises to my level and they are looking for an emotional reaction out of me. So, instead of acknowledging the name, thus giving it credibility it doesn't deserve, I turn the tables and laugh at them with something like, "Is that the best you can do?" By utilizing this method, I give them the emotional response they wanted, but not the one they expected which throws them off and gives me the opening I need to cut down their accusation, usually by asking for proof. They can't provide any proof because, well, there is no proof, I point out the lack of proof weakens their argument (usually by calling them liars), and I admonish them for making up fish stories about me. Then, I leave them alone to stew in a defeat of their own making.
Unfortunately, this sort of thing is met with resistance from Republican leaders, who prefer to try to be nice to the Democrats who are maligning their characters. Apparently, they think fighting back is a sign of negativity that will hurt the party or, more accurately, hurt their chances for reelection. Just be glad the Republican leadership isn't writing a handbook on wilderness survival.
"If a bear is attacking you with his teeth and fangs, run out and have a press conference apologizing for upsetting the bear and make a call for bi-species cooperation with the upcoming camping and hiking season."
The thing is that when someone calls you a Nazi, evil, or Tom Green, you should be willing to defend your honor in some way. (Well, anyway except saying, "Oh yeah?" That will guarantee you at least one Atomic Wedgie.) Fighting back is not going to make things worse, and it's certainly better than letting people who think the best way to raise federal revenue is to raise taxes so all but the homeless are paying 55% in taxes run the debate. Stand up for yourselves, Republicans, if only to point out the folly of the opposition's rhetoric, get a chuckle out of it, and promptly relegate it "sitcom on UPN" status.
And that's the Bottom Line.
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For permission to reprint this article, please contact us at editor@commonconservative.com