May the Farce Be With You

Sometimes a lightsaber is just a lightsaber

by Thomas Lindaman
06/01/05

Unless you've been living under a rock (and if you have, you really need to have a talk with your realtor), you've heard about the third installment of the Star Wars prequels "Revenge of the Sith" hitting movie theaters. You may have also heard the media and faux liberals making comments that "Revenge of the Sith" makes some thinly-veiled attacks on the Bush Administration. It seems some have combed through the film and picked out a couple of scenes and quotations where George Lucas decided to play politics with his creations, even though Lucas himself has denied the parallels.

I saw "Revenge of the Sith" not too long ago and I admit I can see where some parallels could be made for those wanting to make them. But whenever I saw Anakin Skywalker saying, "If you're not with me, you're my enemy," or when the Emperor said, "I am the Senate!" when fighting Yoda, one phrase ran through my head.

It's just a movie!

Yes, as hard as it is for some Democrats, some media outlets, and some people who still live in their parents' basement, "Revenge of the Sith" is just a movie. There's not some deep political message in it that requires a DNC Secret Radar Decoder Ring to decipher. And there are two big reasons why I think there isn't a political message in the film.

1) It would be too obvious. Lucas isn't the best storyteller in the world. Any man who would create Jar Jar Binks and think he adds something important to the Star Wars saga is fallible. But there is one thing I will say about Lucas: he understands the importance of subtle imagry. He doesn't come right out and say "Anakin Skywalker will become Darth Vader" in the first three installments. Instead, he lets us see the conflict that creates Vader. For Lucas to resort to such obvious Bush bashing would not be his style. And if it were intentional, I guarantee you it would be so ham-handed the only way to make it worse would be to have Michael Moore appear in the film as Darth Needs-Adkins.

2) It would cost him revenue. The thing to remember about the Star Wars saga is that it attracts people from all sides of the spectrum, young and old, male and female, people who have kissed girls and people who think dressing up like Darth Maul when it’s not Halloween is a way to get the really cute girls to like you, the hygienic and the French, you get the picture. And, yes, even conservatives and Republicans like Star Wars. If “Revenge of the Sith” were as politically charged as some would lead us to believe, I guarantee there would be fewer people in the theaters than a showing of “Fahrenheit 911” in Crawford, Texas. Lucas makes money off these films, and the best way to ensure he can keep getting money is not to torque off too many people, especially if they’re willing to pay $8.50 a pop to see a Star Wars movie.

Yet, as I stated earlier, there were parallels that seem relatively plausible connecting the Sith and the Emperor to the Bush Administration. Yet, there are also plausible parallels between the Sith and the modern left. For example, there’s a scene where Yoda describes the Sith as selfish, concerned only about themselves, and lusting for power.

Can you say “Bill and Hillary Clinton,” boys and girls? I knew you could.

And there’s more than just Bill and Hill. A withered old man who talks funny like Yoda? That’s Robert Byrd! An odd looking creature that nobody but an extreme minority likes like Jar Jar Binks? Welcome to the Star Wars universe, Al Franken! A leader whose overconfidence leads to him blowing up like Grand Moff Tarkin from "Star Wars"? DNC Chair Howard Dean, come on down! A tall, dark man who is sheltered from the outside world under a scary mask like Darth Vader? Paging John Kerry! A crusty old man who contols incredible power over his minions like the Emperor? Say hello to our good friend, George Soros! I could go on, but you get the idea.

I find it curious and more than a little disheartening that Democrats and faux liberals are trying to shoehorn real world politics into a fictional galaxy far, far away. They're doing their best to try to become winners by proxy by saying, "Hey, we're just like the Rebellion from the Star Wars films and they won, so we can, too!" But there is a huge difference between the Rebellion and the Democrat Party.

The Democrats don't have George Lucas writing their future.

And that's the Bottom Line.

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