"The Right Angle"

Heidi Parent

Random Thoughts

On Democrats and their three wise men:
Jesse, Howard, and John F.

by Heidi Parent
12/16/03

Would'ja Make Up Your Mind?!

Here's what I think must have happened. Someone dropped the Democrat talking points on the floor and when the pages were picked up, they were put back in random order. How else would you explain their schizophrenic criticism of President Bush's Iraq policy? Before the war began Democrats pleaded with the President for months to take it slow and build a coalition. Then once the war began, they demanded the President hurry up and announce an exit strategy. And now they're claiming that the President's exit strategy is premature because it's being determined by the political timetable of the November elections. (The fact that no such exit strategy has been announced apparently isn't important. In fact, truth be told, the only exit strategy the President has ever stated is this: we will leave Iraq when we have won. If that's before November, so be it. If not, oh well.) But jeez, Democrats, which is it? Slow down, hurry up, or slow down? If we were riding in a car driven by these flea heads, we'd be reaching for the sick bag by now.

Who Needs Consistency When You Can Rhyme?

And now, another installment of Democrat Inconsistency. Brought to you by Jesse Jackson.

Being a Chicago area resident I get to engage almost daily in that ever-popular game, Pop Up Jesse. (You just never know where he's gonna turn up next!) And once in awhile the game provides a real gem. As was the case recently when our local news covered Jesse's well wishes to a group of area reservists who were on their way to Iraq. In his rhyming exercise (more commonly referred to as a speech) Jesse said the troops will help make us more secure. Wait a minute, Jesse, if I recall correctly, you opposed the war. So how can you on one hand say the troops are making us more secure and at the same time claim Iraq wasn't a threat? Just what threat are these Iraq-assigned soldiers keeping us safe from? Oh wait. That's right. You can say it because you're a Democrat. Your words don't have to be consistent because they're never questioned by the press. Nevermind.

Howard Dean: Foreign Policy Moron

Just days after stating, "Mr. President, if you'll pardon me, I'll teach you a little about defense," Howard Dean appeared on "Hardball with Chris Matthews" and flashed some of that foreign affairs brilliance. When asked how he would deal with the threat Iran posed, Dean replied, "Iran is a more complex problem because the problem is not as clearly verifiable as it is in North Korea. Also, we have fewer levers. The key, I believe, to Iran is pressure through the Soviet Union. The Soviet Union is supplying much of the equipment that Iran, I believe, most likely is using to set itself along the path of developing nuclear weapons. We need to use that leverage with the Soviet Union and it may require us buying the equipment the Soviet Union was ultimately going to sell to Iran to prevent Iran from developing nuclear weapons."

Howard's campaign chalked up the slip of the tongue to fatigue. But fatigued or not, this slip was a pretty big one. After all, he wasn't referring to some minor player on the world stage. He didn't call Congo "Zaire." We're talking about four references to a country that was our biggest enemy and threat for over 40 years, but went the way of the Betamax over a decade ago. What's next, Howard? Questioning the President's policies toward Mesopotamia?

John F***in' Kerry

It doesn't take much insight to recognize that the Kerry campaign is in trouble. With Howard Dean giving him fits (Dean is ahead of Kerry by 30 points in New Hampshire) Kerry is trying desperately to be noticed. To that end, he has begun a pathetic exercise of try-everything-and-try-it-fast. So one day we're treated to John F. Kerry: Easy Rider Dude with Cool Hair, being photographed on his motorcycle sans helmet. Then he gave us John F. Kerry: Surfer Dude with Cool Hair, being photographed at sunset on the beach. After that we got John F. Kerry: Hip and Happening Dude with Cool Hair on "The Tonight Show," only to be upstaged by a puppet. As I said, things aren't going well. But not ready to give up just yet, Kerry decided to give John F. Kerry: Dude with Cool Hair Who Relates Well To Youngsters a try. During an interview with Rolling Stone magazine, John F. said, "When I voted for the war, I voted for what I thought was best for the country. Did I expect Howard Dean to go off to the left and say, 'I'm against everything?' Sure. Did I expect George Bush to f*** it up as badly as he did? I don't think anybody did." Well, I guess we now know what the F stands for. Anyway, the press made a beeline to get a response from the White House where Chief of Staff Andrew Card predictably suggested that John F. apologize. But that was exactly the wrong thing to do because it played right into John F.'s hands. He needs to be noticed - for anything! And if that means creating controversy, so be it. It's a strategy right out of the Publicity: Even When It's Bad, It's Good handbook. What Card should have done is just let Kerry's comment pass. But in noticing it, Kerry's name might get back in the mix just enough to get his campaign back on track. If that happens, what would political junkies have to watch for the next six months if not John F.'s floundering? Thanks a lot, Andy!