In Support of a Wild Goose Chase

Taking aim at anti-hunting zealots

I wasn’t going to write this one. In fact, I was going to write about "tagging." I’ll do that soon because having a bunch of gang "wannabes" spray painting their "art" on other people’s property is one sure way to boil my blood.

But not this week. This week I’m going to write about hunters and hunting.

There was a recent story in the Everett Herald regarding the Washington State Department of Fish and Wildlife’s offer to organize snow geese hunts on private property. Such hunts would be an effort to reduce the numbers of snow geese in an area near Everett and alleviate some of the damage they’re causing to local farms.

As you might expect, that’s raised some hackles.

Fine. That’s where civil debate comes in. Proposal. Counter proposal. Argument. Counter argument. Out of such might come a plan that, while not perfect, was at least workable and able to be agreed to by most. I get that. What I don’t get are those who, instead of offering reasoned argument, persist in getting their panties all in a wad and then trotting out all of the old humbuggery about hunters and hunting.

To wit:

Hunting is a "barbaric" sport. Hunters are mouth-breathing simpletons whose only source of amusement is shooting anything that moves. In fact, according to one individual, "90% of the people who have guns are Jerry Springer. They end up shooting themselves more than the geese."

Do tell.

Name-calling and stereotyping are fun, don’t you think? Let’s try it.

Ninety percent of the people who oppose hunting are animal rights wackos who get their jollies by burning university research sites, splashing paint on those who wear fur, and trying to convince others that life can be sustained on a steady diet of tree bark and bee droppings.

Yep. It’s fun, but it sure doesn’t get us anywhere other than to a place where we’re harrumphing at each other with bulging eyes, closed minds, and rising tempers.

Most hunters don’t hunt because they want to. They hunt because hunting is part of their nature. In my case, I can’t remember a time when I didn’t want to hunt. While growing up, I regularly begged my dad to take me. For a variety of reasons he couldn’t, so when I got older I went out and learned on my own.

It’s been, very simply, the most rewarding sport I’ve ever taken up. It teaches ethics and sportsmanship. It teaches humility. It teaches the need for preparation, hard work, knowledge, and study. It teaches that, even with preparation and hard work, success isn’t guaranteed but lack of success doesn’t equate to failure.

It also teaches humor.

On that last, I’ve learned that if you can’t laugh at yourself, don’t even think of taking up this sport because, sooner or later, you will make a fool of yourself in front of friends and strangers alike. You will fall. You will get wet. You will, in fact, be sleeping under a tree and have a deer sniff you while others are watching and trying to keep from busting a gut.

As for being "barbaric," if what hunters do to stock their freezers is barbaric, I’d then offer that the people who roam the meat aisles of every supermarket in this country looking for Sunday’s roast fall pretty much under that same umbrella. The only difference is that hunters eliminate a lot of commercial steps to get that same roast to the table.

As for intelligence, I’d be willing to stand a cross-section of hunters up against any group you’d like and bet hard money on how they’d stack up.

You see, I’ve sat around too many campfires listening to doctors, lawyers, airline pilots, engineers, business owners, teachers, and just plain hard working people talk. Most times, I kept my mouth shut so as not to lower the level of discussion.

It’s kind of tough to just wave an arm at these people and declare them either ignorant or barbaric. I guess you can, though, if you enjoy shallow thinking and hollow rhetoric.

I understand that there are those who don’t want to hunt. My wife of 36 years is very firmly ensconced in that group. She understands, however, that there are others (her husband included) who deeply believe that, when done properly, it is an ethical, exciting, and challenging sport.

Be nice to bump into that attitude more frequently whenever the topic of hunting is raised.

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